Words by Ruth (scroll to the bottom to listen to Ruth reading this)
No matter how many times this journey between worlds happens, there is so often a new thing to learn on the returning to regular life. Perhaps that is obvious, but sometimes it is too huge to name and the process too long to measure. It does not necessarily make a difference how long we are in an altered state, but when it is sustained over days there is some kind of lostness to overcome. What did I touch? Who am I now? Did the whole of me even return fully?
I used to really struggle with this and feel bereft in the process of reintegrating but then I began, through practise, to find ways to help myself back. Recently it felt like I was new to this process all over again and suspended somewhere in between. One foot in both worlds is a practise and I’m not sure if it is something we can ever know fully how to ‘do’.
There is a possibility that this is our natural state, one we knew without any seams as a child, and so remembering that sense of belonging is almost overwhelmingly
moving and brings up grief for what was lost when we surrendered to the loud calls to
comply and fit into the various roles and rules of becoming a human, and a
responsible one at that!
Then a second bridge when we forget the certainty of the dream world, the magic and potency of childhood knowing THAT we really are little teachers to the ones that have already crossed the bridges.
Are these the echoes that stir up grief and longing, and if so it isperhaps a good idea to not only refuse to rush the process of stepping back into ‘normal’ life, but also to consider that you, me, we, are better served by the grace of a being who didn’t step back completely and retained the ability to access worlds beyond the known. Not only that, but one who serves as a bridge for those who need help to cross themselves for a time.
September song insiration: Septemeber Fields / Frazey Ford
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